Lightning Bolt ⚡
Bio
Bolt ⚡ aka Bill, a bizarre bisexual bipolar alliterative epileptic Taco Bell Futurist 🌮 ☇ a sexy ♒ Aquarian oddball with an erratic brain↯🧠↯ Author of comedy, poetry, sci fi, & horror.
I am shock therapy.⚡ Subscribing risks electrocution↯.
Achievements (11)
Stories (236)
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The Changing Face of America
I live in Indiana. It's a 'Red State.' 🤢🤮 When Trump was elected President in the abysmal year of 2016, his Vice President was Mike Pence. Pence was the former governor of Indiana. Mike was a typical conservative in most ways. He was a notorious homophobe.
By Lightning Bolt ⚡about a year ago in The Swamp
They were the Best of Memes, They were the Worst of Memes
I'm seriously out of control! Someone should seriously stop me! I'm having too much fun! Okay. I won't stop. I published this stuff originally in a Place-That-Shall-Remain-Nameless (🤐the Journal Community) before there was a proper place at Vocal for comedy. Recently I've been migrating shit over here, where it belongs. I've updated this routine and removed all those contagious Covid jokes that weren't funny at all. All they did was cause inflation. My Bad. 🤷
By Lightning Bolt ⚡about a year ago in Humor
We Don't Stop Meme-ing Because It Grows Old; We Grow Old Because We Stop Meme-ing . Top Story - April 2022.
I've written several 'comedy routines' inspired by the memes I yank from my Facebook feed. I call this series Meme-ing For Laughs. I started writing this crap a long time ago, before Vocal had a Humor Community. I'm now in the process of migrating all those guffaws over here— to their proper place in the Humor Community! This one previously won a Top Story thingie!!! ⚡😁👍
By Lightning Bolt ⚡about a year ago in Humor
My Identity Delusion
There was only one rule: don't open the door. The problem with that was... I'm a rebel. If you tell me not to do something, I'll do it, just because you told me not to. Put a barrier up in front of me; watch me take a battering ram to it. I'm fiercely independent.
By Lightning Bolt ⚡about a year ago in Horror
When the Meme-ing Gets Tough, the Tough Get Meme-ing!
I published a bunch of stupid memes a while back, with the intent of titillating! This stuff was originally published in the Journal Community. I decided to tweak it & migrate it over to the correct location (the Humor Community that didn't exist when it was originally conceived. 🤯)
By Lightning Bolt ⚡about a year ago in Humor
What Have I Forgotten Now?
Today was his birthday. I live at the residence where he passed away. -—-The seizures hit me a week ago, causing me to break the toilet seat as I fell to the concrete floor. I'm still sore.--—- The "extended illness" mentioned in my brother's obituary is a euphemism for "years of drug abuse that ended in an overdose." It's curious to me that I've never seen his ghost.
By Lightning Bolt ⚡about a year ago in Poets
