Jamais Jochim
Bio
I'm the guy who knows every last fact about Spider-man and if I don't I'll track it down. I love bad movies, enjoy table-top gaming, and probably would drive you crazy if you weren't ready for it.
Stories (291)
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Sparrow on a Plank Chapter 17: When Villains Do Their Research
The crew was more interested in what was behind them than in front of them. Although Sal and Hajime were doing their level best to hide the fact that they had stolen a book from Set’s temple and that temple may have been protected by someone representing the Bubastan government, Captain Taylor knew what was gointsg on; it had been part of the contract (after all, they needed him ready to go if something had gone wrong, and his ignorance would have slowed the ship’s reaction time, causing a number of unintended deaths and destruction of the ship). Rick had also been told out of necessity for the same reason. They had also been given a certain time; if Sal and Hajime took longer than two hours, the ship was to sail. Period. Staying any longer would have endangered the crew and the boat. Rick was happy that that condition had not been used.
By Jamais Jochim9 days ago in Chapters
Energy Sources Preppers Should Look Into
Preppers debate alternative energy sources. There is always going to be a debate over which one is best, as it depends on the specific needs of the prepper and the environment they are in: You need to look at what you have available when deciding on which energy source is the best for you. However, don’t be trapped by a false binary situation: You can select multiple energy sources, depending on your environment and financial situation. Also, bear in mind that, if you want to be completely self-sufficient, then there is a learning curve as you will need to learn how the technology works.
By Jamais Jochim9 days ago in Lifehack
Spells for Specialists: Fifteen New Spells
Fifteen New Spells: Spells For Specialists Fifteen New Spells for wizard subclasses that I've been making. [While these spells are great for regular casters, they were created for the five subclasses I've created. Specifically:
By Jamais Jochim11 days ago in Gamers
Tattoos & Rail Guns Chapter 17: Every Piece Moves
Deezle the Defiler felt something, an itch at the back of his skull. He had been left alone on monitor duty, he was always left alone on monitor duty, and so he had begun to trust that itchy feeling. He looked at the various scrying mirrors that they had set up; each was paired to another mirror at a different location, allowing the demons to keep an eye out on what happened at distant sites. Most of them looked normal; all but the one had a crack through it and had gone black; it wasn't even reflecting.
By Jamais Jochim13 days ago in Chapters
Brass Ring Interlude 4: When The Cherry Blossom Finds The Wind
Onna-Bugeisha exited a simple tunnel and entered her basement. She was fully armored, but her paired katana were sheathed. While she hated sneaking into her home, she and Kaneda had decided it was necessary if she were to remain with CAPES, providing her with a haven none of her enemies would know of. She smiled as she remembered him pulling out a shovel to help dig the tunnel even as the Steel Amazon had appeared to help her dig it. She had had to broker a compromise, suggesting that if he could make them tea with a light snack that would be sufficient for his share of the project. He had acquiesced, and the two women finished the tunnel, including supports, within a couple of hours. The strawberry teacakes he served that day were still her favorite. He sat back and let the two women enjoy being who they were while he cheered them on.
By Jamais Jochim14 days ago in Chapters
Been There, Done That: The Traveler Mage Subclass
Been There, Done That: The Traveler Mage Subclass Hogarth teleported in. Thankfully, the information he had on the coordinates proved accurate. He looked at the dial in front of him; he had never seen such a wheel before, but after consulting his journal he had several ideas which numbers would get him past it. He dialed in the first set of numbers and the stone door ground open. Inside lay treasure, but not of the golden kind: Scrolls of a papyrus that hadn’t sunlight in a thousand years and a few artifacts of a forgotten age. He cast a spell of comprehension and looked through them for a moment, the scrolls would rewrite history. He smiled, gathered as many scrolls and artifacts as he could, then teleported out.
By Jamais Jochim16 days ago in Gamers
Sparrow on a Plank Chapter 16: On Not Becoming a Shrimp's Dinner
Sal and Hajime were walking down the pier as a group of merchants were running the other way. Some of them were covered in stew. They looked at each other and shrugged. As they came closer to the Hell’s Wrath they saw Rick putting away the catapult and a couple of boys from the mess rubbing the big pot down. Rick saw them, and bellowed, “Heave to!” They rushed up the gangplank, past splotches on the pier, and it was taken in just as they hit the deck. Hajime kept moving to his quarters, where he quickly secured the book and shucked off the more confining of his clothes. He was down to tunic and breeches and then up to the crow’s nest to help guide the ship out.
By Jamais Jochim16 days ago in Chapters
I'm Going to Raise Myself An Army: The Necromantic General
Branchae surveyed the field in front of him. He had thirty zombies in the field, twenty with swords and ten with bows, versus forty orcs. He smiled. He had his twenty swordszombies charge into battle and his ten bowzombies rain arrows on the orcs. His bowzombies would keep changing targets when their targets were eliminated, with one looking for the chieftain. He sent his crawling hand off around the bend to look for the orc leader. The orc leader saw the hand and charged it. The hand retreated and the chieftain followed it. Once he popped into sight of the bowzombies, Branchae had them change their targeting; the chieftain was quickly peppered with arrows. The orcs were easily cleaned up.
By Jamais Jochim18 days ago in Gamers
Valentine's Day Sucks
Valentine’s Day sucks. Boyd sighed as he saw Charlie sidle up to the bar and order a beer. A few feet away sat his girlfriend. This was a problem. His friend Charlie ran a standard Valentino scam on vampires: He would seduce them and then kill them. He was good at it. However, he had a healthy libido, so occasionally he would fall for a target. This could cause complications.
By Jamais Jochim19 days ago in Fiction
Tattoos and Rail Guns Chapter 16: When the Silo Finally Explodes
The morning came. Walker shoved Douglas awake. Douglas tried to cast a spell, but the motion caused him to fall off the bunk. He glared at Walker. After they had dressed, Walker gave Douglas his assigned knife; he had already put on the matching set. “This mission should help test out the daggers.”
By Jamais Jochim19 days ago in Chapters
The Human Encyclopedia: The Scholar Wizard Subclass
Xavier glared at Ganor for the thousandth time. The barbarian wanted a flame for light and the books were the obvious source. The barbarian just want to fulfill a pyromaniac urge, but the scholar needed the books to solve the riddle before them and allow them freedom from the cell they were in. He looked at the books, his background in history helping to figure out which book held the answer to their predicament, and by chance he picked the right book. He translated a passage, and discovered that the solution to the riddle required mixing the chemicals in the right order. He smiled at the memory of his mentor Sandrarius, who had drilled basic alchemy into his head, and through the mixture at the given target.
By Jamais Jochim21 days ago in Gamers
