i...uh
i want...um
i think
i mean
the pace of life is so grueling...
you know?
i think i just want things to slow
down and
relax.
just a little bit.
you know,
i don't say this out loud, it's not a popular opinion, but
i wish we could go back to quarantine.
not the part where people died en masse in hospitals, alone with no family to ease their transition.
just the part where we were slow.
you know?
when we made bread or noodles from scratch. when we spent time alone or intentionally with pods. when we learned new skills to do ourselves because we couldn't necessarily rely on someone else anymore. when we meditated. when we took walks. when we napped and rested our bodies fully. when nature began to heal because the rate at which we pumped pollution and toxins into our atmosphere decreased so dramatically. when time became relative again, and the insistence on measuring it accurately faded. when we learned what was truly essential work. when we began to value labor for what it is, an expression of spirit, not an obligatory mechanism for survival. when we read books. when we found new music. when we cultivated our interests and not our bank accounts. when we cared about something other than money.
i know our corporate overlords never stopped. but why would we let them gaslight us into thinking the way the world was before was better, that all that shit killing us slowly was "normal?"
covid kills us quickly and they don't care, so why would we listen to what they think is best? for profit that will never be ours? for the chance at upward financial mobility? to take our shot at being a billionaire?
bullshit.
i call bullshit.
fuck.
i just want to take a nap and not feel bad about how "unproductive" it was.
fuck a to-do list.
can't we just rest?
About the Creator
kp
I am a non-binary, trans-masc writer. I work to dismantle internalized structures of oppression, such as the gender binary, class, and race. My writing is personal but anecdotally points to a larger political picture of systemic injustice.
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Comments (3)
Slow days heal the soul in ways that are unexplainable. quiet mountain drives as most people stayed home instead of rushing to a place that they hated anyway. The cultivation of new creation. I love this and I agree so much, what I don't miss is that dividedness and the separateness that created rifts between people. I felt so much hate from some people. But on the other side of things, I miss what words cannot explain so easily. I did work in "essential work" myself, so it wasn't all just stay home for me, but it was peaceful in the world, everything quieted down, that birds and the bees felt welcomed and the sky was brighter than ever. Such a beautiful and deep reflection, thank you for this! It is a helpful reminder to slow down, because even in times like these, we need to remember that living is about us, not the big guys, we don't live for them, we live for ourselves and our loved ones! I hope your day is well and just slow enough that you remember what it's like to breath deep
Oof, I felt this, kp. So much
I wish to go back to straightforwardness too. Those were the days.