Everyone is Acting

The poor animal let out a pathetic whine as Henry kicks it, cruel grin on his face.

“Don’t look away,” Henry says. “I want you to see.”

She couldn’t say anything. She hates him so much.

Mother comes storming out of the house. “What is taking you kids so long…” Mother trails off as she sees the cowering, bloodied dog at Henry’s feet. She doesn’t say anything. No one ever says anything.

“Dinner’s ready. It’s time to come in,” Mother says.

“And wipe those tears,” Mother hisses at her as she walks past. Mother means that Lucy should act like nothing is wrong. Everyone always acts in this family.

Henry shoves her as they come inside.

Every Friday, her whole family gets together for a big family dinner. Though its not the whole family. There are some faces missing. Her cousin Sarah is away at college. Sarah’s younger sister Ariel took a job that has her working nights. Though, Lucy thinks Ariel prefers it that way.

Uncle Bill wasn’t at his seat next to Auntie either. He had been missing these dinners lately.

And of course, Dad…

Lucy yelps at the sting of Mother pinching her thigh. Mother always pinches her when she looks sad. She always has to smile and act happy. They all have to act during these dinners. Acting meant she couldn’t allow herself to feel. Sometimes it was like she wasn’t even in her own body. Like a piece of her was buried somewhere else.

She sits next to Mother. Henry is on Mother’s other side. Lucy is at least glad she doesn’t have to spend the whole dinner fighting off Henry. Auntie sits next to Grandmother on the other side of the table.

Grandmother sits imperiously, sipping her wine, lips as red as blood. Our entire lives are her theater and she directs every role.

“Grace, your sister tells me Bill met someone perfect for you at his firm,” Grandmother says to Mother. Lucy stiffens.

Auntie nods. “A rich client of his.”

“You’re replacing Dad?” The words escape her lips before she can stop herself. Mother pinches her harder until she cries out. Henry snickers from the other side of Mother.

“Your father abandoned you almost a year now. It’s best your mother moved on.”

Tears prickled at her eyes, but she held them in. She bites her lip so hard she tasted blood.

“What’s his name?” Mother asks.

“Connor,” Auntie replies.

“Bill will be bringing him to dinner on Friday,” Grandmother says.

Grandmother turns to her, the full heat of her glare bearing down on her face and says, “And you, Lucy. You will be on your best behavior. You will not ruin this for our family.”

Lucy nods.

They spend the night at Grandmother’s house. Lucy hates spending the night there because her the window in her room always faces Grandmother’s roses bushes. There was always something sinister about them that had a heavy pit sinking deep in her belly.

Mother, Auntie, and Grandmother spoke about this new man in hushed voices.

That following Monday was a parent-teacher meeting.

“I couldn’t help but notice how withdrawn Lucy has been. She hasn’t been participating in class,” Ms. Adler says. Lucy keeps her head low, avoiding both Mother and Ms. Adler’s eyes.

“However, she’s still one of the top students in her class. Her writing, in particular has shown significant improvement.”

Lucy flinches as Mother snaps her eyes to her.

Ms. Adler doesn’t miss the interaction. “I think Lucy has been writing more because she feels safer putting her thoughts more on paper, than saying them out loud. Lucy has gotten incredibly quiet since the beginning of the year. Is there something going on at home?”

“Lucy is fine,” Mother says.

“I understand her father is no longer in the picture. Yet when I met him at the beginning of the year, he couldn’t have been more concerned for his daughter. He didn’t seem like someone who would just walk out on his daughter.”

“Everything is fine at home,” Mother reiterates, her voice full of steel.

“I just want to help. We should all be on the same side and-”

“Ms. Adler, what goes on at home is none of your business. Lucy’s father left us. He betrayed our family. That is why she is quiet.”

Mother lunges up from her seat, dragging Lucy out of hers. She bites her lip to keep from crying out from Mother’s rough grip, and the pain flaring through her arm.

Ms. Adler must have noticed the distress on her face because Mother abruptly drops her arm.

Mother marched out the classroom, “Lucy, come!”

Lucy nearly trips over her feet hurrying after Mother. Ms. Adler calls out to her before she rushes out. “I want to help you, Lucy. I can get you out of there. Please, let me help you.”

She shakes her head and catches up to Mother who makes a beeline for the parking lot. Lucy can’t bring Ms. Adler into her messed up family. She just can’t.

“What did you tell them,” Mother growled, her voice tight.

“Nothing!”

Mother shook her shoulders. “You told her something.”

“I didn’t tell her anything! I promise!”

“Don’t lie to me.”

“I’m not. She just thought all this on her own.”

Mother let her go and stares straight ahead.

“I’ll see to getting you transferred out of that class,” Mother finally says.

A dull ache settles in her chest. She likes Ms. Adler. She was a teacher that actually cares. Yet that’s probably why Mother wants her out of that class.

“Your grandmother is going to be upset you have better grades than Henry does. It’s not the order she wants.”

Lucy shrugs. She wants to say it wasn’t her fault Henry was an idiot, but she bites her tongue.

“You’ll be doing his homework from now on,” Mother says. Lucy has already been doing Henry’s homework. Just incorrectly. School always came easy to her. Even Henry’s homework seems easy to her, even though he was two grades above her and she was still in elementary school.

“I can’t ask you to fail. It’ll look too suspicious. But you need to stop showing Henry up. He’s the one who succeeds in this family. Not you.”

The last bit of joy drains out of her and her tears fell freely. Mother pinches her. She pinches her again. She refuses to smile. Then Mother slaps her, the sting spreading across her face. She still won’t react.

“Your father is gone because of you. We are in this situation because of you. You will smile and act the way we tell you to act. You will not embarrass us.”

It turns out that Mother couldn’t transfer Lucy out of Ms. Adler’s class so late in the year. Grandmother has Mother pull Lucy out of school altogether.

That following Friday, Auntie and Uncle Bill bring over Connor. Connor was tall and broad shouldered, and greying hair at the temples. Lucy might have guessed he was handsome, but Mother and Grandmother just cared about his money. The thing she notices most about him is his smile. His smile is different. It’s not strained or fake. It’s not covering up a bitter sadness.

Everyone liked the man. He was smart. Successful. And he would make them all look good. He kept coming for Friday night dinners.

“Be on you best behavior,” Grandmother warns her. “Do not ruin this for us.”

Mother, Grandmother, and Auntie go into the kitchen. It was where they plot. She never goes into the kitchen. It’s always spotless and stinks of bleach,

She sometimes wondered if she was kidnapped and her real family was out there somewhere looking for her. But a look in the mirror always showed her it wouldn’t ever be true. She looks too much like Mother. Lucy knows she’s pretty because Mother was pretty. It’s probably what had Connor coming back every week.

He starts coming over more. He took Mother out on dates. Mother seems happier now. That’s always a plus because it meant she wasn’t always under Mother’s scrutiny. Maybe Mother would finally let go of her anger over Dad.

The thought of Dad makes her sad, but Connor was nice at least. She likes him, but the feeling is sour. She wants to tell him to run. To get away from this twisted family before it’s too late.

He would always come bearing gifts. Her greatest gift was she didn’t have to act around him. Everyone else did. Everyone else had to be on their best behavior.

“Don’t you see something…weird about these people? I didn’t notice it right away, but there’s something…something I’m missing.” Lucy overhears Connor ask Uncle Bill. They’re standing far enough away from Mother, Auntie, and Grandmother that she was sure they wouldn’t overhear. Henry is outside somewhere, possibly torturing another animal.

“Grace is a nice lady. I know her mother can be…trying at times. She means well though,” Uncle Bill says. Connor tries to prod Bill, but Bill evades his questions.

Lucy was never close to Uncle Bill. Brainwashed. That’s the term she learned from doing Henry’s homework. Uncle Bill turns a blind eye to everything. He knows his daughter, Ariel, is on the verge of dropping out of school so she can work full time, while Sarah gets everything. Anything to get away from this family. Lucy knows that’s her future.

Dad wasn’t brainwashed. He couldn't pretend anymore.

“Why don’t you go to school, Lucy?” Connor asks her one night.

“Lucy is homeschooled,” Mother answers for her.

“I know, but why? Henry goes to school.”

“Lucy prefers it this way,” Grandmother says.

“No I don’t,” Lucy mutters. Everyone at the table looks stunned. Grandmother slams her hands on the table. Lucy and Connor flinched.

“Lucy is homeschooled because we’ve had problems with her teacher and this was the best option,” Grandmother says. Her voice has an edge to it, and Connor dropped it, but he made a halfhearted excuse and made his exit.

Grandmother waits the minute Connor’s sports car backs out of the driveway and turning down the street before she tears into Lucy.

“You better hope this doesn’t ruin my planning,” Grandmother says, her voice like acid, her perfectly manicured fingers. They have Lucy sleep outside by the rose bushes.

Grandmother says she’ll be watching her, but as Lucy wanders around, she realizes Grandmother must have fallen asleep. She finds the shovel by the garden tools. She finds the spot just under the rose bushes and starts digging.

Lucy is truly numb inside. A sort of still calm settles in her.

They had already taken everything dear to her away. There’s nothing else left. She finds the contents wrapped in a sack. She shoves it into her bookbag, behind Henry’s school books. It’s the one place she knows he won’t snoop.

Lucy fills in the hole and scrubs her hands of the soil.

The next morning, she puts on her best acting. She pastes on a smile and pretends nothing was ever wrong. Mother and Grandmother talk in the kitchen in hushed voices, talking about how to deal with her, and how to fully ensnare Connor.

Mother left her phone on the dining table. She takes it and texts Connor.

Come pick me up and I’ll tell you everything.

-Lucy

She types in an address then deletes the text. She puts the phone back and slips out.

Her heart races as she walks as fast as she can. If any of her family catches her, it’ll be all over. She sees the familiar sports car pull up next to her. Connor stops for her and she quickly climbs in.

“Were you ever considering marrying my mother?”

Connor lets out an awkward chuckle. “Don’t get me wrong kiddo, but there’s something really creepy about your family.”

“Creepy undersells a little,” Lucy says.

“I agreed to meet your mom because Bill was so pushy. Desperate even. And I didn’t notice anything at first. Your family is so good at acting.”

“Acting is what my family is best at.”

“That they are,” Lucy whispers. “My brother is a budding psychopath.”

Connor nodded. “I can believe that. Is that what everyone is hiding?”

Lucy laughs. “My grandmother is a true psychopath. She has this philosophy that one child in the family should be chosen for excellence. And everyone else needs to do everything, give everything to prop them up.”

“And your grandmother chose Henry. That’s messed up.”

“For the longest time, I thought it was normal. It’s all I ever knew. Grandmother’s biggest rule was everyone has to act. Act like nothing is wrong. Act happy to be in this situation.”

Lucy pulls out a slip of paper with an address jotted down on it. She found it slipped into her writing notebook before Mother pulled her out of school. “There’s someone else that needs to know the truth as well. Can you take me to this address?”

Connor nods. “Yeah, sure kid.” He was a good man. Lucy doesn’t want to reveal the truth to him. He deserves to live in blissful ignorance, but he needs to know.

They pull into Ms. Adler’s driveway.

“I’m glad you got my note, Lucy,” Ms. Adler says, leading them inside. “I tried getting CPS involved, but I couldn’t get enough proof. I knew something was wrong.”

Lucy’s sits at her former teacher’s kitchen table. Connor and Ms. Adler look at expectedly.

She doesn’t know how to begin. She’s kept in for so long. “My dad…did my mother ever bring him up?” She asks Connor.

“She just said he abandoned your family.”

Lucy shook her head. “He didn’t. He would never have abandoned me. When did you notice them treating me the way they do?”

Connor runs a hand through his hair. “Longer than I should have. I’m sorry Lucy.”

“Don’t be. My family is good at acting, remember? We can put up a good show.”

“So if he didn’t abandon you, where is he?” Ms. Adler asks.

Lucy pulls out the soil-stained cloth sack and opens it up at the table.

Connor bolts up so quickly the chair falls backward onto the floor with a thud.

“My god…Lucy, is that…” Ms. Adler says in hushed voice stunned.

“My dad,” Lucy says, staring at Dad’s dismembered, decaying head.

“He was going to leave with me. He couldn’t stand it anymore. Henry found out and told Mother. And Grandmother had Mother kill him. I didn’t see it happen, but I did see Mother dismembering him in the kitchen. They had me clean up the blood with bleach.”

Connor rushes to the sink and retches.

Ms. Adler holds her face in her hands. “I thought…I didn’t your mother was capable of murder. I’m sorry. I should have tried harder to get you out of there.”

Connor wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. “Dammit Bill. What did you get me into? They really wanted me to marry your mother.”

Lucy takes a long breath. “They never planned on letting you go,” she admits. “They were plotting to find something to blackmail you with. Grandmother needed you. With Dad gone, she needed you to fund her lifestyle. Her philosophy.”

“That’s…that’s evil,” Connor says.

“What do we do?” Lucy asks.

“We call the police. That’s what,” Ms. Adler says.

“What if Grandmother gets away with it? That’s what Dad was afraid of. Why he chose to run away with me instead of calling the police. She’s been doing this a long time. She got away with killing grandfather too.”

Connor croaked. “But…how?”

Lucy shrugs. “She’s a good actor.”

“Lucy, you’ve seen more horrors than any child should ever go through. More than I could even imagine. The adults in your life have let you down. Please, let us handle this.”

There’s a ringing in her ears, a tingle in her fingers and toes, like she was back in her body for the first time in months. She allows herself to look at the remains on the table. Truly look at the stained sack. Her father was dead.

She hears a wail. It’s coming from her own throat. She never got to mourn her father. For the first time in months, she doesn’t have to act.

Ms. Adler pulls her into her arms. The sounds that escape her are so small and young. She doesn’t have to act like a grown-up anymore. At some point the tears ran out and sleep took their place.

When she wakes, she’s been moved to the couch. It’s already dark. She must have slept for hours. Ms. Adler and Connor are in the kitchen talking to someone else. She follows the voices. A uniformed officer is speaking with them.

Connor is grim. Ms. Adler’s expression softens at her.

“Your mother is in custody,” Ms. Adler says.

“And Grandmother?”

Ms. Adler shakes her head. “She fled.”

Lucy sighs. “She probably fled when she realized I was gone.”

“The police have questions for you. You might be the best person to find her. But the remains you brought are enough to arrest her. Your mother already confessed and is cooperating,” Connor says.

Lucy is surprised. Then she remembers that Mother is a victim too. Grandmother had her father killed as well. Mother just continued the cycle.

“What will happen to me?” She asks.

“You won’t ever have to go back to them. Your aunt and uncle have been arrested. You’ll be taken to a foster family.” Ms. Adler squeezes her arm. “But I’m going to speak to a lawyer. I’m going to try and custody of you. I’ll protect you, Lucy."